In Private
by Elizabeth Anamon
Summary: If I have anything to say to you, Catherine, I'll say it in private' My take on what Sara might have said to Catherine with no one else around.


**Title In Private**

**Summery "If I have anything to say to you, Catherine, I'll say it in private." My take on what Sara might have said to Catherine with no one else around.**

**Rating T-language**

**Comments I'm surprised that I haven't read more of these. Hu, well, my muses told me there needed to be one more. Enjoy!

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Catherine hunched over the sink in the restroom, her face dripping from splashing cool water on it. It was the end of the shift, and she was still reeling from the events that night. Her head was throbbing and she felt sick to her stomach. _I can't believe what I've just done. I lied to my guys. Oh, my god, what have I done? I not only broke trust, I broke a promise. I promised Nick that I would never break his trust, and tonight I did, and in the worst way._

Suddenly, Catherine pushed away from the sink, swung open the stall door and fell to her knees by the toilet. She felt like she was going to puke, but it was a false alarm. After a long moment on the bathroom floor she rose to her feet and returned to the sink to splash some more cool water on her face. Over the sound of running water and the pounding in her head, she could not here the door open and someone walk in. She was not aware that she had company until she looked up into the mirror and saw Sara standing there, arms crossed and blank-faced. Catherine turned slowly but did not face her obviously angry subordinate.

"Hi, Catherine." Sara said coolly.

"Hi, Sara." Catherine replied with out looking at her. She remembered what Sara had said to her. _"If I have anything to say to you, Catherine, I'll say it in private." _Catherine had been hoping they would not have this conversation tonight; maybe tomorrow after everyone had had a chance to cool off.

Catherine, still staring at the floor, maneuvered around Sara to try to get to the door, but Sara boldly stepped in front of her.

"I told you if I had anything to say to you, I would say it on private. Well I have something to say to you so you had better listen. I think you need to know haw we all really feel. The team is upset to say the least. Greg's hurt, Warrick's confused, Nick's a wreck, and as for me, I'm just plain pissed off. You lied to us, you betrayed our trust, and you forced us to second guess each other. As a supervisor you did something stupid, and as a friend you did something…still stupid."

Catherine meant to say something along the lines of "Please stop bashing me so I can apologize," but what escaped her lips was a statement of anger. "As a supervisor, I will not allow you to speak to me that way. And as for as a friend, I couldn't allow myself to think in terms of friendship when I worked with Keppler."

"You didn't think at all! Grissom would never treat us like shit the way you have. When he come back…"

"Gil's not coming back!" Catherine screamed. Sara raised her hand and slapped Catherine across her face. The smack echoed against the walls of the dimly lit room.

The two women stood in shocked silence for almost a minute. When Catherine finally spoke he whisper was like the loudest bellow. "Sara, I…"

"No, Catherine. Don't say it. I'm sorry. I don't know what came over me. I was way out of line."

"You had every right." Catherine told her, holding her stinging face with her hand. "Grissom is coming back Sara."

"I know."

"I'm sorry about what happened tonight. I can't express with words how sorry I am. But I didn't want to work with Keppler, the undersheriff made me."

"You didn't have to lie to us."

"I know. And I see that now, and I'm so, so sorry, Sara. I don't want this to ruin our friendship, but I know it will. I'm sorry, but there's nothing more that I have to say to you right now."

"If you're through, I'm through. Let's just forget this conversation ever happened." On that note, Sara turned and left Catherine alone.

And that's just how Catherine felt: alone.

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**Tell me what you think. Yes, Grissom is coming back. I hope.**


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